1.21.2011

If Someone Had Told Me

If someone had told me three weeks ago that I would actually crave a ginormous salad overflowing with all kinds of healthy tidbits and consider eating out at Salad Express a treat, I would have called that someone CUH-ray-zee.

If someone had told me that I would consider a clementine or a pear as much of a treat as say, a cookie, I would have laughed. And eaten three or five cookies.
If someone had told me when I signed up for Mother & Daughter tap that I would be required to wear a gingham swimsuit leotard, with a criss-cross back, conspicuously located stars and fringe near my chesticulars, denim hot pants and a cheap hat that sits on top of my large head like a cheap taco, I might have reconsidered signing up--and paying--for this privilege.If someone had told me it would take Annelise five attempts to write a letter to an American soldier with a pen instead of the pencil I originally suggested I might have been more insistent. (First grade has been collecting socks to send to soldiers in Afghanistan.)
If someone had told me that I would fall head over heels, SWOON I'm in lurve with a pair of pointy-toed cowboy boots I would have told that someone they were sadly misinformed.
If someone had told me that said pointy-toed boots fit like a glove, instantly make me feel sassy and equally sad to take them off I would have said no way, Jose.
If someone had told me I would bypass the super-sized snack foods and quickie freezer fixes at Sam's Club (our area's version of Costco) and gravitate while I salivate toward the produce section I would have laughed in that someone's face. (Although I could not resist buying 36+ rolls of toilet paper and a pizza for Scott and Annelise. Well the TP is for the whole family, I feel better knowing we're all stocked up. I can't explain that.)If someone had told me I would spend 1.5 hours longer at the magic hair place today because of a temporary keratin treatment I might have said I'll pass this time. The good news is it did make my hair silky soft and it actually moves individually now instead of as a unit. (That photo is my Medusa look while I was getting the color magic done.)

I'm glad that someone kept his or her mouth shut.

(Well, except for the whole tap dance attire.)

11 comments:

  1. You are hysterical. The taco...I can't stop laughing. I want to know what it is that salad. I haven't ventured into the beans/peas arena yet but I'm willing. I'm like you though in how I actually crave dark green salads with olive oil-based dressing now. I never, ever thought it was possible. Love your boots! Can't wait to see your hair. You have a long list of things to feel sassy about, woman!

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  2. HAHAHHAHAHHA Does not even begin to explain the volume of my laughter right now! So glad to finally get a glimpse of the SuperModest Mom outfit!!! My goodness! I'm glad to see you stepping out of your box! You go girl! :)

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  3. Wow, these are a lot of changes really and you're loving them, now that's inspiring!

    What is up with that costume for the mother/daughter tap dance? Who would chose such an ensemble for adults to wear? I'd have to opt out of the dance because it would be downright disgusting for me to wear such an outfit. I'm so glad this is not an issue I actually have to face right now.

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  4. I think I would actually die if I had to wear that dance outfit. Oh my goodness! You are a trooper!

    I'm glad your new way of eating is going so well! I found this fabulous blog of this cutest vegan girl ever, and I just love it. I'm not vegan, but dairy free, and vegan is the only way to find good dairy free recipes it seems. Anyway, check her out, I think you might like her! http://ohsheglows.com

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  5. Just so you know... there is no way you are getting away with not posting a pic if yourself in the tap dance outfit! Yes, I will allow you to wait and take the picture on the actual day of the event, but just so you know, Missy.... you are going to share! LOL!

    So glad your diet it working great for you. I know you are feeling better. And I can't wait to see a pic of the fabulous hair treatment results.

    Love reading your blog!

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  6. way to go on your eating plan! I wish I could get so motivated. I KNOW it makes me feel better.

    as for the "costume"...wow! I know I couldn't do it. good luck!

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  7. Oh GOlly- Holly!!!
    I love this post-
    and
    I double dog dare you to put up a photo of you in those outfits :)

    Oh my- that is a lot of change for one month & a lot of fun for us readers to think about.

    ARe you losing weight on this diet? I'm in desperate need to lose some quick pounds (ha, like that ever works) for an upcoming event with Brian & his sweet heart- wink- wink.

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  8. Holly...we will wear the outfit proudly and try not to hide behind our girls. haha! I think we can pull it off. Yeehaw!

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  9. I love the boots! I have also found myself wanting some, something I never thought would happen. I mean, I have lived in TX all my life and firmly resisted the cowboy boot stereotype, but I am now ready to embrace it.

    Good for you on the healthy eating success. I still need to work on that.

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  10. Do we get a picture posted of the mother daughter leotards?

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  11. If I don't chicken out I'm sure I'll post some photos when we do pictures in a few months. Maybe. :)

    Patsy: I have lost some weight but I don't know the exact amount since our old scale and new scale are different, but my clothes are fitting better--so YAY! Plus I really do feel better in general eating mostly vegetables and fruit. Really.

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